Algunos días nos levantamos pensando que nos espera un día terrible, que tenemos que encontrarnos con gente que no deseamos, realizar un trabajo con el que no nos sentimos realizados, y vamos por la vida siempre con las prisas a cuestas.
No disfrutamos de nada de lo que nos va sucediendo, no aprendemos ninguna lección, no sacamos prácticamente nunca nuestra mejor sonrisa con nadie, no sea que parezca que somos agradables y la gente nos pida más de lo que estamos dispuestos a dar.
Somos egoístas por naturaleza con el resto de mundo y con nosotros mismos.
En lugar de ver el vaso medio lleno, disfrutar las cosas que nos suceden y sentirnos bendecidos por la vida que podemos llevar, nos quejamos, vivimos desde el estrés, en lo que pudo ser y no fue, y cuando nos damos cuenta ha pasado media vida y ya no podemos enmendar, por desgracia, tantos errores como cometimos.
Yo misma me he pasado la vida torturándome con esa costumbre dichosa que te inculcan a fuego en la infancia de competir continuamente con el resto de gente, y que supone que tengas que ser el mejor/la mejor en todos los sentidos.
Me encanta la inocencia de la infancia y estar con los niños pequeños, porque ellos no temen al futuro, no miran con maldad nada de lo que les pasa, se caen y se vuelven a levantar con una sonrisa en la boca, cosa que nosotros, los adultos, no somos capaces de hacer, es más, ni siquiera recordamos cuando fue la última vez que algo nos hizo reir a carcajadas.
Por si todas estas cosas no fueran suficiente, como psicóloga me doy cuenta a menudo del daño que nos hacemos a nosotros mismos con autoexigencias, que nos generan una tensión que pocas veces podemos aguantar, y que derivan en casos de ansiedad y estrés, que tampoco trabajamos y nos van consumiendo poco a poco.
Las personas somos seres imperfectos por naturaleza, y, en lugar de admitirlo y vivir con ello, querernos tal y como somos y disfrutar el momento, nos empeñamos en meternos en dietas absurdas, que lo único que consiguen es frustranos, en gimnasios donde nos desmotivamos en una semana, porque pensamos que por más que lo intentemos, no vamos a llegar nunca al objetivo a cumplir, y algo todavía más doloroso, que usamos como un recurso de nuestra vida diaria, sin darnos cuenta, y que no es otra cosa que criticarnos físicamente, odiarnos cuando nos encontramos con nuestro reflejo en el espejo, decirnos a nosotros/a mismos/as cada mañana «podría estar mejor´´ en lugar de «estoy estupendo/a´´.
Resulta fácil manipular la autoestima propia y ajena, porque no queda en nosotros solamente, sino que, como no estamos satisfechos con el autoconocimiento doloroso y el martirizarnos de la mañana hasta la noche, pasamos a tratar a la gente de la misma forma, a ver si también dañamos la autoestima del otro y nos sentimos mejor si compartimos el malestar.
He visto amigos que en lugar de disfrutar de su mutua compañía, se insultan de forma encubierta y se dan consejos estúpidos que ellos mismos no pueden cumplir, amigas que no se detienen a valorar el daño que le puedes causar a una persona diciendo que no la ves muy bien.
Y el peor de los casos, he visto madres y padres que exigen tanto a sus hijos, que consiguen que seamos personas que no toleramos la frustración, que no sepamos perder, pero tampoco aceptar la parte buena de nuestra forma de ser, que es la entrega y la pasión en las cosas, por encima de que estén bien o mal hechas.
Una vez, alguien me dijo que los padres son los peores enemigos para el desarrollo del individuo, que te frenan en seco y te cortan las alas cuando parece que empiezas a despegarlas, pero yo me pregunto si esta afirmación es verdadera o es una forma de justificar la forma de ser de la persona que se ancla en lo malo en lugar de en lo bueno que le sucede.
No dejemos que nada superficial estropee un día de nuestra vida, que es demasiado bonita para pararnos en las minucias.
Dejemos de causar un daño gratuito, sin pararnos a valorar las secuelas que pueda tener para la persona a la que vaya dirigida semejante crítica.
Encontremos algo con que sorprendernos cada mañana, disfrutemos de la gente que nos aporta las mejores sonrisas y los mejores momentos, estemos motivados a la hora de empezar todo proyecto que vayamos a iniciar, luchemos por ser cada día un poco mejor personas, y no nos dejemos llevar por las exigencias absurdas de esta sociedad, contaminada con un perfeccionismo irreal, pero que venden como pan.
¡Ámate, esa es la esencia al final de tu vida, ser consciente de la suerte que tienes de haberte conocido!
KATYA BAÑULS.
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